Saturday, October 26, 2013

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"You come first. Be your own best friend. Do incredible things to care for your life. How you treat..."



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spooky-pocket: snarkeet: kateordie: I became obsessed with...



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beyonce: Melbourne, Australia October 2013 Photographed by Rob...



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squaremeal: (via Tangerine Sorbet and Chevre Tart «)



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love-and-goodvibes: sun-and-moon-spirit: Live by the Sun☼ Feel...



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10.25

I almost forgot to write today's post!!! All around great day. Ended up hanging out with my classmates after class today. Socializing has really rejuvenated me. I know that sounds crazy, but I could tell the difference in my overall demeanor and spirits after our dinner making session was over. They really are a sweet group of people and I can't wait until my craziness dies down so I can have normal Friday nights hang out with them. I decided to apply to more jobs here just become one has already fallen through (surprise, surprise) so I need to cover my bases and find a couple more. Luckily, it's a lot easier to apply to stuff here than in the US! After feeling better today, I don't even mind. I just couldn't see a way out of this whole process up until now, but I'm really almost done I promise haha. I've had to catch myself lately about not being grateful for all the opportunities I'm finding to apply for. While it does honestly suck to be this stressed out, I need to stop whining and sounding full of myself to other people.  I might be making it sound worse on paper than it is in real life, but I ultimately know no one is making me do all this and it's better to put in the work now then have my foot in my mouth later when NOTHING works out. At this point I'm worried I won't find anything because I have been ungrateful in some ways up until now.... All I can do is live and learn and try and correct it moving forward I guess. Applying to stuff this time around is a complete 180 from last year and I would happy with any of the opportunities I have applied for thus far so for that I am thankful. I'm also thankful that I'm starting to find my own voice as a result of this whole process...In other news, I think I'm going to make myself have an awkward conversation with a boy I like tomorrow... Tomorrow's post might be realllly long haha, but I'm trying not live with keeping stuff bundled up inside for moving forward because it does eat away at me after a while. Tired of living with regrets and I really like him. I also need to say something to him for some other, more serious reasons (not that liking a boy isn't lol). I'm horrible with my feelings, but (even though I'm starting to realize how true this is myself) even the universe is trying to tell me it's better to have tried to love and lost than not at all lol. Going to do some light work, apply to more stuff then sleep. Sorry for such a long post. A lot happened today haha.


I've been saying this new mantra to myself everyday and it's really been helping. I suggest everyone find something that speaks positively to they are trying to change their insecurities and say it to themselves every morning when they wake up until the believe it. Talking the talk helps with walking the walk.

Here's mine:

"I am fantastic. I am pretty. I speak Chinese well. I am in control of the food I eat."

I might write a follow-up post on this bit over the weekend when I need to take a break from all the crazy.

~inner peace, self love and a positive attitude
K.S.

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